30 Oct Drop The Sexual Agenda
The Sexual Agent – What happens when we drop this and get curious and open to spontaneity?
When we can step out of the box, we come to discover that male bodies can develop themselves as multi-orgasmic beings.
Secondly, the same goes for female bodies being fully wired to enjoy a multi-orgasmic life not limited to the famous clitoral orgasms.
This is the truth of our sexual potential, and I hope that you will explore this without the expectations.
Just try it. Let go of any other agenda you may have brought into the bedroom, in any way that you want it to go, let the outcome drop away.
Removing the goal is an invitation to drop deeper into connection, to fall deeper in love and embrace the unknown. Let your senses come alive and guide you.
What is the biggest miracle game-changer for your sex life?
There is a simple answer to this.
Remove the agenda! Have Spontaneous Sex!
Remove the agenda around sex NOW to save your relationship.
The agenda? What agenda is that exactly?
Everyone may have a unique schedule for which they have developed their strategies.
However, the typical plan in sexual interactions boils down to the orgasm, which is often experienced as some sort of finale—the dramatic ending of a performance.
It is time to stop rushing to get to the ending and simply feel what is happening.
Tune in to the sensations in your body and let that become the portal to immense pleasure.
This is the ironic part of the equation. It is possible to get so lost in your head, focused on the end of the act. Instead of enjoying this epic moment, you may get distracted by your goals and outcome.
The goal has become the finish line, and the race ends before it starts.
This is a bit like going for a long hike through the most pristine emerald forest and not even taking in the beauty and wonder of all the amazing trees, plants and creatures around.
There becomes so much anxiety about this finale.
For men such pressure of When Will I Cum!?
“When will I cum? I better orgasm before I lose my erection…but not too soon or she will be disappointed…” and so on.
This orgasm at the end seems to have become symbolic of the value of the sexual exchange.
For women, there is also a tremendous pressure with orgasm that their partners often do not realize. She feels the pressure to orgasm, not just for her but for him.
They worry that he will not feel empowered unless he brings her pleasure as well. He is somehow convinced that pleasure exists alone in the orgasm.
Here we lose sight of the pleasure that is available in every breath. Ironically, he feels pressure and tension for his performance, and she feels it also at the same time – a need to deliver.
This is frequently happening for those who have fallen into sexual patterns.
We need to focus on the glorious reality that pleasure is available in every moment.
When a woman is feeling on the spot to orgasm, this pressure can sometimes backfire and create tension and expectations.
I often work with my clients to simply drop the focus on expectations.
This is some of my most influential work.
The whole point is to drop into the body and feel. When we can let go of these desired outcomes, we can enjoy the pleasure of our bodies much more freely. It is as simple as that.
I have supported many clients to remove the sexual agenda, and it always creates more freedom. It is a new level of lovemaking. The more free we feel, the more room for pleasure and expansion—the more room to just be ourselves.
I am not talking about never having these orgasms but removing them as the focus of union. I suggest trying it for yourself and seeing what else comes.
Imagine you are on holiday that you have been dreaming up for years. You have planned to visit the world-famous destination site at 4 pm. It starts to be a day full of mystery and surprise. This magical land is full of exotic smells, tantalizing flavours and so much colour dancing through your vision.
You receive some unforeseen invitation to adventure, yet you behave rigidly and instead push to make it to the site by four.
You arrive at the gates feeling overwhelmed by the noisy crowds and notice your body is feeling contracted and even frustrated with this part of the experience.
At this point, you suddenly wish you were not even there like you should have just stayed with the escapades that you had shrugged off to get to your destination at 4 o’clock. What would have happened if you had dropped this plan and really enjoyed all that this day could have offered you in this far off mysterious land. It is up to you to choose your own adventure.
Drop the Sexual Agenda: Get curious and open to spontaneity
When we stop forcing, then we can experience the aliveness of the present moment. Then we open to ourselves, open to our partner, the Beloved and the intoxication of unlimited pleasure.